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You would think when you're married to someone - especially after many years, that you actually spend a lot of quality time with that person. Sadly, in this day and age, that's not as easy as it sounds. We have work duties, kid nose-wiping duties, 400 lbs of laundry duties, pay-for-everything duties, and over time, partnership & friendship in a marriage can get lost.
As the years go by, change happens: life goals, wants & needs...but do we find time to express our hearts to our spouse? Do we make time to talk regularly?
Take advantage of the AWESOME-NESS!
Let's say you live in an area where there is something AMAZING to go to all the time (mountains, beaches, Disney...). A lot of people would assume you enjoy your surroundings everyday. But most locals from those areas don't take advantage of it regularly - because they know they can enjoy the scenery anytime, so it becomes a "We'll do it later."
Don't we do that to our marriages? We don't put talking, planning, or sharing on the top of the list...because we think the opportunity will ALWAYS be available so "We can do it later."
But then loooong periods of time drift by and the later doesn't come - and the close bond & connection with our spouse weakens. We're so "duty" bound, that we don't see spending time together, planning, dreaming, changing direction, or just being silly at the top of the to-do list.
No marriage & family will be successful without unity. Pull out your calendar & notebook, go get an appetizer and talk about changes, goals, dreams, and direction.
What an inspiration!!!!
Recently my husband and I went on one of our planning dates at a nearby restaurant, and a couple was seated near us. They sat at the same side of the table together, and were sharing an appetizer. I was trying not to stare and creep them out, but I was so blessed to watch them enjoy each other's company. They probably noticed my continually glancing over at them, so I went over and asked if they were married, and if so, for how long. 51 years!!! They were married for 51 years!! I told them what an inspiration they were to me - and I enjoyed seeing them spend time together. They told me that yes, it was VERY important to invest in their marriage. What an inspiration!!!
Planning Date - a free worksheet download...
Click on the worksheet to download & print it.
There are many aspects within a marriage that needs to be viewed as a business. No business will be successful without unity among the management team. The key to harmony and success within the marriage is being on the same page in terms of direction of operation within the home...
So grab your spouse, head down to a local restaurant (or put the kids to bed early), and tighten the unity within your marriage. Share your heart, dreams, & goals.
Jesus knew their thoughts and said to them, "Every kingdom divided against itself will be ruined, and every city or household divided against itself will not stand." Matthew 12:25 (NIV)
Love this Christy!
ReplyDeleteThank you, friend!
DeleteI recently read that spouse's only spend 20 minutes a day together. 20 minutes a day!!
ReplyDeleteI'm inspired by people who keep that connection for so many years - it's wonderful to see. Makes me realize that it's possible for me as well!
WOW - I did not hear that, but I believe it! It's definitely something you need to keep on the priority list because quality time does NOT happen on it's own. You need to schedule it, arrange, it, and FIGHT for it! Thank you for sharing!
DeleteI love this! Right now we have no kids, so essentially we are without excuse. But I recently realized that I needed to make an effort to spend time with hubby. Otherwise, we would go our own separate ways every day.
ReplyDeleteEven without kids, there are always life things to do that distract us from quality conversation. You are so right about eventually drifting apart without time together...that's a lesson to us all!
DeleteLove this, Christy! I was just sharing this with someone earlier today. Dreaming together is most definitely one of our favorite past times. Hanging out and chatting with one another is another :).
ReplyDeleteThank you, Fawn! Those are our favorite times too.
DeleteExcellent, Christy. We're headed for 38. By now the kinks are surely smoothed out. But it's still important to dream and plan and we do that quite often...many times over breakfast out. I just read today one couple said they were married at a time when things that were broken were fixed not discarded. I think neglecting your marriage is the same as discarding it.
ReplyDeleteWOW, Pamela - I love hearing about enduring marriages. I'm so glad to hear that you still dream and plan after 38 years!!! Yes, that quote is actually on my post just before this one with a great picture...I LOVE it!!!! I also agree what you say about neglecting your marriage - thank you so much for sharing.
DeleteWow, Christy! You are so right and I needed to hear this today. We do get so busy that the fun time (bonding really~) and simple pleasures get put on the back burner. That is mighty sad!!
ReplyDeleteI 'Liked' you on FB and appreciate your excellent message :)
Blessings~
Jacqueline, it's always SOO nice to hear from you! You are so right, and bonding time needs to NOT be on the back-burner. Thank you for the support & encouragement.
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